Thursday, October 07, 2004

on my way to finishing up applications and getting interviews, i stumbled upon this

well, that's not a completely true title. i didn't stumble upon this, i was reading the sports guy's article because i love to read his stuff. but this was too funny, so i decided to pass in on to my readers. (and i AM turning in two applications today, going by best buy to give them this phone number, and going to an open interview at starbucks...see, i want to work) without anything further, here is some great stuff from today's column by bill simmons, the sports guy:

The more I'm thinking about it, they're like the Stepford Wives of baseball fans: Everyone wearing red, everyone banging those Stix, nobody actually knowing anything about ins and outs of the game. They would chant "Pedro sucks! Pedro sucks!", but at odd times, like when there were 2 outs in the inning and he had just struck someone out. They would stand and cheer when the scoreboard told them, but they wouldn't stand with two outs at the end of the inning when Colon had two strikes on someone. It was like watching a bunch of foreigners. There was almost something cute about them, like they made you want to say, "Ohhhhhh," like watching a dog wag their tail when they get a treat.

The classic Anaheim fan story: My buddy Hench and I were walking into the game and doing the "Let's go Sox!" routine every time we walked by someone wearing a Sox hat or jersey. I mentioned how there were a surprising number of Sox fans walking around, followed by Hench joking that the number of Angels fans at Friday's game at Fenway would be either zero or zero. So some Stepford fan turns around and sneers, "You gotta get there first!"

Um ... what?

"You gotta get there first!"

Apparently the chip in his skull was malfunctioning.

"We're up 1-0 in a five-game series," Hench said. "I'm pretty sure we're making it to Game 3."

Then the Stepford fan came back with some "You guys have been losers for 90 years" and "19*8!" stuff. About 20 seconds too late. I think they immediately returned him to the factory for repairs.

no, my style as a writer hasn't been influenced by him at all, why do you ask?

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