Thursday, July 29, 2004

a cynical view of marriage (cynical read: realistic)

i really felt like i had good things to write when i opened up this page. and then, i get here, and the profundity is gone. i guess i should talk about a conversation i had with two married friends today. both are women in their late 20s. one has been married seven (yeah, seven) years, and the other for almost one. they were both talking about how hard married life is, and how stupid so many people are when they get married, not having any idea what they are getting into. this is a sort of vindication for me, since i have been ranting for almost a year about my idiot cousins and their engagements/marriages. you see, i get this feeling that they think life will be awesome because they are "in love," but they don't realize that that really isn't enough. there is a helluva lot more that goes into marriage than being in love. my mom has been telling me that i am being rude/arrogant/insensitive because of the way i've been talking about these people, but i think they deserve to be reminded (though not outright, i'm too proper for that, sarcastic asides are more my style) that they are under 24, have NO idea what life is really like, and don't even know what they want from themselves. all these things just make me think that their marriages are going to get really f*&^ing hard really quickly. i mean really really hard. in talking to these friends and telling them that i'm content to be single, i remembered that i really am content to be single. so even though girls are really pretty, my hormones are annoying, i have a pretty good community around me, and i think that it would be really nice to have a girlfriend, i'm quite happy to be single. quite happy indeed. i think that's all, turned out to be a pretty nice post, from my point of view, which is all i really care about right now, i suppose.


Jacob said...

I agree. In general. Maybe it's selfish of me, but I really want to experience what I want to experience when I'm fresh out of college. I wouldn't want to give up my own ambitions to rush into marriage, either. See, this is why you're a philosopher.

Krispin Mayfield said...

You just have a really twisted view on marriage. The reason their marriages are difficult is because they didn't follow God's plan. You have to pray and seek for the One God has for you, and then, not only will you have a godly marriage, but also a much easier one. The difference between their "in love" and the kind of "in love" is one is God-ordained and the other is not. It is simply this. You need only pray for the One God has for you.

This is just a defensive mechanism for you, Josh. First, you know you are not praying all the time for 'the one.' If you had been, like you should, you would have found this divinely romantic love. You are jealously cutting down others who are following into marriage. Or maybe you don't want to get married, but really know you are supposed to. Did you not just graduate from a prestigious Christian college? Obviously God has so many plans for you, how will you serve Him without such a companion?